All About Sulylicous...

Some say I'm a sweetheart while others may say I'm a bitch. Yes this can be true, but who really knows the real me? You see, I work hard for what I have. No I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth, far from it, but I was raised in a way where I had to earn anything I wanted. I don't have time to entertain those that settle for mediocrity. I work hard for everything I have so I get upset when I see lazy able bodied adults sitting on their asses collecting a check. Don't get me wrong... I know everyone needs help from time to time but I hate it when people turn welfare/section 8 into a damn career. So if you see me as the type that looks down on people or even try to degrade anyone that is not at my social economical level, that's bullshit, I just don't have patience for people with EXCUSES!

My life is not perfect, but who's really is? YES, I have bills up my ASS, I have family problems, and I even have ISSUES WITH MY SELF. But I live life to the fullest, like I'm the richest person in the world. You know why, because when I'm old I'll have so many effing stories to tell and have NO REGRETS. And when I die, I know none of the material stuff comes with me anyway, however, I will have had the satisfaction of living a good life.

My love is intense and tough and not too many people can handle it. But you see, the world is tough, and not too many people can handle that either. But what they don't understand is that we all face the same issues one way or the other. We must hurdle over these barriers in order to get to the next level in life. If not, we'll be stuck in the same place for the rest of our lives. And I don't know about you, but I need change, I must evolve in life. And if that means I have to sacrifice certain things in my life, I'm gonna do it. Yes, I get scared. I'll have insecurities if I will be successful in whatever changes I need make in my life, however, if that is what it takes to get me over whatever barrier I'm facing, than I will make that sacrifice.

You see we get COMFORTABLE in our surroundings and change becomes the ENEMY!! We want a better life, we're not HAPPY but CHANGE is the enemy!! FEAR takes over our mental state of mind and that's when all the excuses begin. Don't get me wrong, I'm speaking from experience. I've been there. I know what it feels like, but eventually we all need to make a change for the better of our lives. And no one is going to just hand it to us or give us the right answer, they can only advise. We control our destiny, and if we make the wrong decision, which I have done plenty of times, we just pick ourselves back up, dust the dirt off our shoulders and move on. Life is full of lessons and we must MOVE ON! Yes we will feel sad, disappointed, discouraged, and even pissed off at our decisions in life. But these are just feelings for the moment. Everything happens for a reason and the events of our lives are just a catalyst for what's in store for our future.

Always remember there will always be people in this world worse off than us. So don't shit on me because of where I'm at in my life. Just look at it as me being ahead of my race and keep in mind there is always someone ahead of me.

I'm an ambitious and enthusiastic person. I love to use these qualities to motivate and encourage others that are in my life. When you meet me I can come off as shy and quiet. But once I'm comfortable, I'm loud and silly. However, if you cross me I can be your worse enemy. I'm very down to earth and I get along with almost anyone. I'm independent and responsible but don't boast about it every chance I get. Everyone defines independence their own way. I'm very goal oriented and secure about myself. I'm a BIG DREAMER and hustler. Always working on making my dreams come true. Never settle till I feel complete. I'm easy-going and fun-loving. I love to have FUN but I also enjoy staying home and being a geek... I could watch National Geographic all day. I hate when things become mundane and always up for a good party. Definitely down for a trip out of town. I love going places I have never been before. I don't care if I'm somewhere for one day just two hours away, I just love the fact that I can say I've been there. Family and friends are highly important in my life. I can be very girly, but I'm never too shy to bum it out in a t-shirt, sweats, no make-up and my hair a mess. I'm a big believer in loving yourself. Having high self-esteem is very important because though we have failings and weaknesses, we must always keep a positive attitude, believe that the next day will always be better, and consistently live our lives to the fullest no matter what barriers we face day by day.

WHO ID LIKE TO MEET?
I like to meet anyone who motivates and encourages me to be a better person, physically, mentally, and emotionally.
Physically, is anyone that can motivate me to better in the physical things of life. Active people that can keep me from being lazy, healthy people that can keep me from getting fat, and freaky people that can enhance my sex life... teach me something I don't already know LMAO!!
Mentally, is people who know what their priorities are and have goals that they are trying to achieve in their lives. Never making any excuses. Never settling. They can keep my mental state of mind on the right track of life. People who are responsible for their actions and don't live with regrets, just lessons learned. I love people who know when it's the right time to take action and when to be laid back. I also like to meet successful and positive people because they can only influence me to move forward in my life and not back. I HATE NEGATIVE PEOPLE!!
Emotionally, is anyone who can motivate me to be a better daughter, sister, friend, lover, and someday a mother. We're not perfect people, that's why we need each other in our lives to influence us in areas that we are weak in. What doesn't kill us can only make us STRONGER.

WHY AM I SINGLE??
Well, I want to find myself a man that can add to what I have, not take away. I feel men I meet are intimidated by me because I have an education, a career and I do for myself. I'm not a needy woman, so they don't know what they can offer me. Well, what I want is balance, nothing more, nothing less. I think it's more fulfilling for a man and a woman to WANT each other rather than NEED each other.

I want to find someone that can satisfy me mentally, physically and emotionally. I find that some men can't carry conversation well which is why they don't like to go out on dates... Not good for my mental satisfaction. I also find most men very selfish and forget that physical gestures (not just sex) like a hug, hand holding, and a simple kiss on the neck is very important in satisfying a woman physically. I also find that men don't understand how to satisfy a woman emotionally by simply communicating how he feels and what I mean to him. YES WOMEN ARE EMOTIONAL however, a man's actions toward us determines how emotionally attached a women can get.

I want to give myself to a man that's not afraid to give himself to me. Again BALANCE... I will only give what I feel I receive. I sometimes feel I'm cold, distant, and incapable of true love because I'm afraid of giving too much. But than I feel that it's just because I haven't met a man that can bring out 100% from me.
So, until I can find what can satisfy me I'm just staying single and enjoying what life has to offer cause it's better to be by myself then with some broke ass, irresponsible mama's boy that ain't got shit to offer me but drama!

YA HEARD!!!!

Friends Come and Go...

Friends come and go, that's life!

Some people tell me I am too friendly, too trusting, and too caring. They say I shouldn't trust people because you never know what their intensions are. But I disagree. Life is full of lessons and these lessons are learned from people that come in and out of our lives. The people that have come into my life yesterday, today, and tomorrow only make me a better person, even if they have made a negative or positive impact in my life. Yes I have been hurt, let down, and lied too. People have made me cry and those same people had once put a smile on my face. I just can't let old friends keep me from making new friends. Nor let them get the best of me.

Why?

"People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know whatto do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a Godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then,without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.!

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant."

So thank you for being a part of my life, whether you are a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Dear Suly,

Dear Me,

Hey Sweetie, just in case you're feelin' someone… It's ok to like and show interest towards someone you believe may be special, but here's just a few little known facts to keep in perspective. Read up!!! You know YOU Gotta look out for YOURSELF…
PLEASE Honey, DON'T chase after ANY guy unnecessarily… If a man really wants you, nothing can keep him away! If he doesn't want you, guess what, nothing can make him stay!

Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior!

Allow your intuition (YOUR GUT! --- If something in the pit of your stomach says, "something ain't right" guess what honey, it probably isn't) to save you from heartache. (Girl… save yourself the headache!!!)

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't
mistreat another friend.

Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is YOU.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, "Why would he treat you any differently"?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.

If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel like he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or a better career.

Do not make him into a quasi-god!!! He is just a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else's man. Oh Lord! If he cheated WITH you, he will cheat ON you!!

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. ALL men are not dogs.

You should not be the one doing ALL the bending...compromise is a two-way street baby.

You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with any unresolved issues you may have before pursuing a new relationship.

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun! Remember that...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes...when he always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he may take it for granted. NEVER accessible!

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others too.

Now keep these things in perspective baby, and you'll be just fine. The next time you have a drink with the girls make a toast to this:
Here's to the guys that love me, the losers that lost me and the lucky bastards who get to meet me!


Loving you always,

Me